After leading yoga teacher training for over 20 years, I’m constantly amazed by how much I learn from my students. The transformations I witness are nothing short of incredible, and I feel deeply honored to be part of such powerful journeys.
Let me tell you about Sally, one of the students who participated in my yoga teacher training. One evening during a reflection session, she bravely shared her personal journey—one that revolved around overcoming something we can all relate to: the voice of her inner bully.
Sally’s story began with a childhood memory: “When I was a young girl, a boy named Derrick bullied me relentlessly. He’d sit behind me in class, heckling me, calling me names, and giving me this stare that made me want to disappear. I wanted nothing more than to run and hide. But as I grew older, I realized there was an even bigger bully I couldn’t escape—one that lived inside of me."
She went on to explain that this inner bully was far worse than Derrick and all the childhood torment she endured. "It was that constant, nagging voice telling me I wasn’t good enough, that I didn’t deserve happiness, that I was somehow fundamentally flawed. And the sad part? I believed it. For years, I lacked self-love, self-confidence, and a true sense of worth. Even though I’d excelled in college, built a successful career, and had a beautiful family, I could never fully enjoy it. Deep down, I always felt like a fraud, like I wasn’t worthy of any of it."
Then came a pivotal turning point. Sally had always dreamed of doing yoga teacher training, and finally, at forty-five, she decided to go for it. "Signing up for the training was the best decision I ever made," she said. "It forced me to face myself in a way I never had before. The self-doubt didn’t magically disappear—I constantly questioned whether I’d be a good teacher, if people would like my voice, if I’d fail. But instead of shrinking away from those fears, I confronted them."
Sally made a promise to herself: “This year will be different. I won’t let my inner bully win. I’ll be kind to myself.” She started with small steps—writing affirmations in her journal, replacing harsh self-criticism with gentle encouragement. "Instead of saying, ‘I completely screwed that up,’ I’d say, ‘Okay, that wasn’t perfect, but I showed up, and that’s enough for now.’"
This shift wasn’t easy, but as Sally shared, life isn’t supposed to be easy. "Where there’s life, there’s struggle—and it’s in the struggle that we grow. I’ve learned to recognize when my inner bully is speaking, and instead of letting it tear me down, I choose to respond with kindness. I remind myself that my mission is bigger than my doubts, and each day I try again—whether I succeed or fail."
Through hard work, persistence, and self-compassion, Sally found a way to silence her inner bully and replace it with a voice of kindness and positivity. "I now stand here, stronger and more confident, not because my life is suddenly perfect, but because I’ve learned to be kinder to myself. My message to anyone reading this is simple: We all have a choice. No matter where you’ve been, no matter how long you’ve listened to your inner critic, you can choose a different path. Be kind to yourself. Love yourself. And don’t let that inner bully win."
Sally’s story is a powerful reminder that the real transformation doesn’t just happen on the yoga mat—it happens in our minds and hearts when we choose compassion over criticism, and courage over fear. It’s a journey we’re all on, and Sally’s experience is a testament to the fact that we are capable of creating a life filled with love, peace, and joy.
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